Love, Self

“Baby, don’t hurt me, don’t hurt me, no more…”

So, what is love, anyway?

When someone talks about self-love, how does it reconcile with not being self-absorbed?

I find it funny that in this day and age, Love could be equated to “not being cruel to <object>”. Or at least it is when the <object> is yourself.

Suppose that you have gotten yourself into a situation where you are not getting your needs met, be it physical existential needs or social needs. At some point, you will run out of fuel and you will be digesting yourself in order to continue producing the output that makes yourself a so-called valuable member of society.

Too general? Let’s say you are in a job that you love, but it doesn’t pay enough to give you at least 2 decent meals a day on top of the rent. At some point, your body will tire itself out and what was merely unsustainable in the long run becomes “My body is dying of hunger, please save me.” And this is because food wasn’t met. Hence if you love yourself, you would then look for a job that actually feeds you. This one is simple.

What about the opposite problem that Gen Y keeps harping on about? Your job pays very decently, but it is so odious that you resort to using the extra money to buy things and/or experiences to justify the occupation. At some point, when the Ego depletes, the urge to take and use an Uzi on your co-workers would be too damned high. Hence, if you love yourself, you would then look for a job that feeds your soul as well as it feeds your stomach. This one is also simple.

But what about other things that occupy your time and attention? Such as social relationships like a romantic relationship?

Perhaps we should remember that we are responsible first to ourselves and as such, should always seek out situations and circumstances that taxes us less.

That, I believe is the first step to self-love.


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Hankit Mok

I live to tell stories. Sometimes, I get paid for them.

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